Perfection

There is perfection-
In the coffee stains
You leave on my table
In the marks of longing
You leave on my neck
In your denial of hugs
When I ache for them
In the promising sunset
When you drive away.

Felon

A yankee candle burns conspicuously
And I can barely breathe
I sleep trying to escape
The reality of my pain
I wake up to watch movies
And pretend to myself
That they make me laugh
But like the yankee candle
I burn slowly dying inside
A glass jar that is my being
And yet like the yankee candle
I have to smell and look good
Till the last bit of me is burnt

You

You leave my soul bathed in your fragrance,
A fleeting glance, chameleonic eyes-
That reduce me to crimson insignificance
Dark, dangerous, gentle redeemer of-
My forbidden fantasy/ my starkest reality
Consume me, finish me, leave nothing-
But the desire to merge my non-existence
With my endless universe, my immortal you.

Taxi in Mumbai

Her grubby hands intrude on my haven
As she fervently taps the glass
I stare into the driver’s baldness
Pretending not to notice her desperation
The red light persists, the taxi complies
I rationalise- shall I then appease my self
Or shall I never support beggary (need)?
My education wins, the lights are green
And the petrol fumes mock her hunger.

The Simpleton

To find that moment of abandon,
To be free, to taste true, comforting love,
O if life were that simple, I would be-
A simpleton

To grope in the dark for sweet surrender,
To kiss, lick, bite, piss, caress, fuck and purr
If ecstasy and agony were simply one, I would be-
A simpleton

To walk into the enfolding, forgiving waves,
To humbly give me up to the mighty sea,
O if death were that simple, I would be-
A simpleton

A Note to my Brother

I might often seem distant,
Lost in the darkness of my deeds,
In the fathoms of my need for life
But you sit stubborn and unmoving-
Somewhere in the back of my mind
I will not promise never to fail you,
I will not promise to love you everyday
But in the strongest fold of my being,
You persist, and this fleeting hour-
I am glad I throbbed in the womb
That unapologetically formed you first.

My Poison

I slashed sadness on her treacherous white throat
And watched her bleed her profane sanctity
I hurried through that dark, fearsome tunnel.
(Exit)
The new darkness shines through, and here-
I go again, celebrating the same mistakes.
They define me and give me wings.
(Enter)
And yet I crave the warmth of two hands,
Holding me, strangling me, gagging me,
Love, can I truly ever break free?
(Stay)